Alright people, it’s time to talk about a topic that is often hushed up – sexuality! But more specifically, let’s focus on body education for girls because let’s face it: the patriarchy has done a pretty poor job of doing so. {Quite the understatement here!}
The first step towards true agency and empowerment for girls is education.
We need to provide our young girls with accurate information about their bodies so they can make informed decisions about their health and wellbeing. It’s time to break the taboo around female sexuality and start having open and honest conversations with our daughters, sisters, nieces, or any young girl in our lives. I mean the more you know, the better decisions you can make, right??
By teaching girls about their bodies we give them the power to take control of their own sexual experiences. Education gives them a sense of agency and empowers them to make choices that are right for them.
Step 1: Body Education for Girls
The first step in this education process is simple: teach girls the correct names for their body parts.
You wouldn’t believe how many grown-ass women don’t know the difference between a vulva and a vagina. Come on, people! It’s not rocket science. And while we’re at it, let’s stop using cutesy nicknames for genitals like “flower” or “pee-pee.” It’s time to grow up and call things what they are. So, get right to the nitty-gritty and start using the words such as vagina, vulva, labia, clitoris, etc…You got this! (And if you don’t, that’s okay too – Google is your friend here!)
Step 2: Body Education for Girls
The second step in the “Educating Girls About Their Bodies” series: puberty and periods. Buckle up because we’re about to dive into some real talk.
First things first, let’s talk about puberty. It’s a term that gets thrown around a lot, but what does it actually mean? Well, it’s when your body starts going through some major changes to prepare you for adulthood. This includes things like growing taller, developing breasts and hips (woo!), and starting your period. This is a good time to normalize this hormonal shit-show for your girl.
Second: ah yes, the dreaded period. But fear not my friends! It’s a completely normal and natural process that happens to most girls once they hit puberty. And guess what? There are tons of products out there to help make it as comfortable as possible – from pads to tampons to menstrual cups (yes, really).
Let’s get one thing straight: periods are totally normal. Most girls get them so there’s absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. It’s just her body doing its thing.
Now, let’s talk about some of the basics. Periods usually come once a month and last for a few days (3 to 7 days is average, although everyone is different). You might experience cramps, bloating, headaches, or mood swings – but don’t worry, it’ll all pass soon enough. And if you’re worried about leakage? Don’t be! This is when you can give the girl in your life some real-life tips: liners paired with a tampon for example, or a heavier flow pad they can use. Make sure you always have one around. I personally kept stuff in my car’s glove compartments and had a special bag for my period haul that I threw into my purse during those special monthly visits.
Step 3: Body Education for Girls
Sexual Activity! Gone are the days where we rely on outdated ideas about sex and relationships. We need to know what feels right for us and when we’re ready to take that next step.
Most importantly, let’s talk about sexual agency. This fancy term basically means having the power to make decisions about your own body and sexuality. It’s all about being in control of what happens (or doesn’t happen) between the sheets. Nobody else gets to decide for her – it’s all up to your daughter, niece, sister, or friend.
Now, onto knowing when they’re ready for sex. Spoiler alert: it’s not something that can be determined by anyone else but HER!
If you’re an adult having these conversations with the girl in your life, it’s okay to let them know your feelings about sexuality and sexual activity, but it’s never a good idea to force your views on them.
Let her decide what works for her and what she wants to do because this truly is the only way for a girl to have confidence and agency over her own body. We know this is a hot topic for some of us, so we’ll tread lightly, but trust us when we say that empowering girls to make their OWN choices and decisions is the most important piece of their identity and their healthy decision making! Giving them all the important facts and science behind how their bodies work and what good choices looks like, actually increases their wise decision making, which to us, is a win-win!
Don’t forget to have an educational conversation around protection, birth control, and taking care to not be around people you don’t know in an intimate setting. Part of taking care of oneself is making sure you are not in any vulnerable positions where your right to choose could be compromised. I also usually have a conversation about girls looking out for each other here too!
We recognize that these conversations are tough!!
This is why we sometimes are asked by parents to incorporate them into our therapy sessions, which, we are more than happy to do!
Remember: we do hard conversations all damn day, so we’ve got you!
So, if you have a pre-teen girl or one that needs extra support around these topics, don’t hesitate to ask us for help in how to start these. Therapists are always full of great ideas for conversation starters, so we’ll be happy to share our ideas or even step in if you need us to relay some factual information (we also don’t believe in imposing our belief system onto clients). Either way, we’re here for you in whatever you need! You can schedule now with one of our rock star therapists or give us a call and our administrative goddess can help you.
Here’s to empowering all our girls in owning their bodies, loving them, and all the magic that comes along with being a woman!
